Enjoying With No Agenda

As I've been engaging with the Forge content I've been inspired to be more engaged in organic relationships with the folks God has placed in my life.  Recently I realized I was growing in relationship with a friend to whom I've felt called over the last few years.  Feeling as though I was following God’s lead, I reached out to him to talk more about his faith journey -- he was involved in ministry in the past, but has since taken a step back from active Christian faith. 

After I had prompted him to talk about where he was with God, I asked about getting together again.  He said, "I don't want this to be about me."  That caught me off-guard.  I realized that I had been interacting with him without bringing myself into the equation.  I was more focused on trying to get him to make some faith move or progress in some sort of growth I had outlined in my head than I was in simply being a good friend to him.

The next time we hung out was at our local brewery.  As I was driving to meet him, I was thinking about how to hang out without making it about his journey.  I realized that it had been a long time since I had hung out with someone without an agenda.  I realized I had maybe forgotten (or never learned?!) how just to be friends with someone.  I had forgotten how to be with people just to enjoy them.  We had a great time that night, and that revelation has shifted how I approach the people that God brings into my life.

Since then I've developed a few new relationships with neighbors, and I feel free not to identify an objective for them or for our relationship, but just to know them so that I can enjoy who they are.  I'm finding I enjoy their quirks more, I see the good in them more quickly, and I feel as though I'm better positioned to be a picture of the Gospel in their lives.